Not This Time

If you are expecting some wonderful words of wisdom, forget it.  I am not in the mood.  I feel like a slug.  I wanna just hang out with myself and enjoy the experience of "not".   What the heck do I mean, you ask?  I mean just "not".  Not not not.  Is that not clear?  Some say not is negative.  That may be true, although in this case, I am thinking of "not" as a very positive thing.  Being clear on what is not right, not desired or just not now, well, that can help you recognize what is. 

Huh?

I suspect you have found yourself like I do sometimes thinking about how life is not what I want it to be.  Not enough money.  Not enough travel.  Not in love.  Not going out enough, not staying in enough.  Not not not.  Focus on the "nots" in your life long enough, and that is all you will see....what is not.

So by not thinking about what is not, I find my attentions drift to what is.  I am and I am that I am.  I have food to eat and air to breathe.  I have friends, I have pets, I have a roof over my head.  Maybe I am not in a romantic relationship, maybe I am not on my way to Italy or Australia, but I am free to dream of those places and, if I finally get my act together, I can go to those places and I can find love.  But one thing I definitely am not, right now, right here, is in the mood.

So, feel sorry for myself.  Oh no, not me!  I know that my choices have brought me here and that is fine.   This teaches me that I can make other choices and do other things.  It is my priveledge and my challenge.  Some say their life situations are not their choices.  If not, then what are they?  Not predestination....no, not this time.